When I was little, I imagined journalists as a cross between Erin Brokovitch and Anna Wintour. They were fabulous, mean when they had to, they never let the truth be buried: they were super pretty bulldogs unearthing facts, and telling the world what the hell they thought of everything. And the world had to listen. It was like being Zorro, Indiana Jones and Yoda all at once!
As a journalist who actually makes a living out of the trade, my life could not be farther from my beautiful dream. The idea that a journalist deals with the truth, with, at least, facts, and if not, with opinions is, well, a Teletubbies version of what is actually happening.
Not only do your opinions mean squat, but facts are relative. Being a glorified PR (everything is LOVELY!) with a tendency to overuse punctuation is what people want.
“There is a way of saying thing” is my least favourite sentence EVER. And believe me when I say I hear it A LOT. What it means, really, is that if you want to say that something is shit, YOU DON’T (exclamation mark).
Not only is everything great, you also have to back it up with facts. And so, just to be on the safe side, your new favourite words are maybe, possibly; your favourite expressions “it might have been said”, “it has been reported” (don’t ask us by whom, who cares, we didn’t say it first, no law suit here), “it seems”… Should I go on?
Do I hate it all? Of course not. But it would be great, sometimes, maybe, possibly, to be able to either say what you want, or to be able to type a sentence that does not include as many trouble buffers as possible.
And that, dear everyone, is my opinion! Who knew I even had one…